Build your Child's Perseverance & Self-Reliance

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How many times a day do your children call you for help? If only we had a dollar for every time we hear, “Mom…  Dad...” This 2-minute video is a great starting place to pump up the SELF-RELIANCE & PERSEVERANCE in our kids.  Our habits as parents, either: 1. Create an environment that fosters perseverance where kids work to solve their own problems or 2. Can move them closer to a habit of helplessness and reliance on others.

Self-reliance: reliance on one's own powers and resources rather than those of others.

Perseverance: persistence in doing something despite difficulty

Wise parents celebrate when their children face every day, normal life struggles such as opening a beach chair, opening a package of string cheese or a toy.

Tell your children ahead of time in a relaxed and calm moment:

1. Perseverance is a muscle we can build by trying, doing, and thinking, even if it’s hard. 

2. In our family, we try ourselves first, then ask for help

3. When they ask for help, instead of doing it for them, try coaching with words and let them do it. Don’t take pencils from their hand, the computer off their lap, or crack the egg. Teach them. It’s ok to model first and then try it together and then they try it on their own.

4. Avoid redoing their work if it’s not to your standard; less than perfect can be ok sometimes. When it does need to be a certain way, coach and let them have the victory of getting it right. Sit next to them while THEY correct their own work, not the parent correcting work.

Mantras to say again and again and again

  • Work on it for 3 minutes, then I’ll help you.

  • Practice makes progress. (Focus on improvement and effort)

  • It’s ok to try and fail and try again, it’s not so great to try and fail, and fail to try again. 

  • You can solve this problem.

  • You can make that decision.

  • Solutions exits.

  • Focus on the solution, not the problem.

  • How can you solve this problem?

  • It’s up to you. 

 

Cami Eiskamp